I Lived Abroad Too — Here’s Why That Matters

I lived abroad in America for almost five years.
South Boston was my destination — I’d watched too many movies growing up and, in my head, I loved America before I ever set foot there.

The reality was very different.

The homesickness hit hard, and I constantly found myself wondering what the lads were doing back home. I was flying through phone cards like Skittles. Even though the neighbourhood I lived in was mostly Irish, it still took well over a year to shake that feeling.

There was no safety net over there, not like at home anyway. You had to build it yourself, from scratch, and that takes a toll.

After about two years, one thing was crystal clear to me: if I ever had a family, I couldn’t raise my kids there. Life felt rushed. Everything moved fast. Safety concerns were always in the back of my mind. And it took me far too long to get used to people not even saying hello when you passed them on the street.

I’m from a small town. Back home you say hello a hundred times just walking to the shop. Over there, people thought I was strange.

Ireland was always home in the back of my mind. I knew I was coming back — I just didn’t know when.

When I finally did come home, I felt it straight away. My shoulders dropped. It was like a weight had lifted. We’re a small country and we have our problems, no doubt — but this land always called me home.

That feeling is something I recognise instantly in couples who’ve been living abroad and are planning to come home to get married.